Adventures With My Tea Muse - Goth Midlife Crisis

 


(Tea Muse portrait by Brittany Lewis)

Tea Muse: (reading the latest issue of Imaginary People Magazine) Did you know that almost every famous person has an imaginary friend? Wow!

Me:  . . . . . 

Tea Muse: (glancing over the top of the magazine) Hey, you okay? What's up?

Me: (sighing) I'm getting old. 

Tea Muse: Yeah and? 

Me: I remember when I used to go to the Goth clubs, dance for hours, and pass out with a black lipstick smile. Or, when I used to play a sneering Vemtrue in Vampire the Masquerade. Or, when I collected all of the Goth magazines. Or when I - 

Tea Muse: (holding up a hand to shut me up) I get it, I get it! 

Me: It's easy for you! You're immortal AND imaginary! You can do whatever you want whenever you want! Me? I went into Crate & Barrel the other day . . . and I liked it. ARGH!

Tea Muse: (giggling) Oh. My. God. Are you going through a (whispering) Goth Midlife Crisis?

Me: THAT'S IT! (looking around) Is that a thing?

Tea Muse: Sure, silly! It's also called becoming an Elder Goth. That point in your black-hearted life when you realize that you can do and be whatever you want to be! Are you still breathing?

Me: (thumping my chest) Last time I checked, yeah.

Tea Muse: And. . . .what's stopping you from still enjoying your life the way YOU want to???

Me: Nothing!

Tea Muse: Let's have our own Goth Night here in the house! Get dressed, I'll get the CDs, and let's Clear the Cobwebs in the Attic (it's really a Goth dance move - look it up!) 

Me: Yippee!

Tea Muse: Um, you can't say yippee. 




Viridian Tea Company - Strange and Unusual Tea Blends

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(artwork by Brittany Lewis) 

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