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Showing posts from September, 2022

Lesson Learned - CONTRACT

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  It was a day like any other - I had taken a break from work to talk with my boyfriend at the time. I knew he'd been with friends after a job interview. He had plans to return to his home city after being away from it for over ten years. I wanted to hear his voice, and my anxiety wanted to make sure that we were still cool with each other. Imagine my surprise when not only did he say that he was no longer interested in me, but he was telling me, "since so many guys flirt with you, why don't you pursue one of them?" I had told him that I met many men (and women) at sci-fi conventions while selling my books, and of course, many guys flirted with me. However, I wasn't interested in any of them because I was happy with my relationship. I couldn't believe what he was telling me, and twenty minutes later, I returned to work with tears streaming down my face. Years later, I wish I could tell him THANK YOU for what he did. Yes, he was afraid to continue the relations

Lesson Learned - VALUE

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  Several years ago, I was on a literary panel at a convention with a big name Steampunk author. I felt myself trembling a little as I approached my chair to his right. He looked at me with a somewhat sarcastic look and told me that he didn't bite. I still felt nervous though, mostly because I knew him to be such a big name and that I was a peon. Years later (now), I looked up his work and thought - this man was not a god. He was and still is an author. And guess what . . . so am I. I used to place so much value on certain people I knew of and befriended because I thought so little of myself. I thought that I would never be a famous photographer, a violinist, or a writer. Well. . . . here I am - Certified Tea Specialist, published author of over 15 books, and owner of a tea company. A violin student once more and an attendee of a death cafe. And many other hobbies and fascinations. And yes, I am worthy to enjoy all of those things in my life. Just like everyone else. My life has va

Lesson Learned - FRIENDSHIP

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Having friends in your life is quite important. They can be a source of advice, comfort, laughter, good times, and a silent yet trustworthy partner. Yet, I learned some time ago that not everyone you call a friend SHOULD be a friend. For example, I've known people whose main purpose was to gaslight and deceive. Perhaps they were the ones who would only be your friend if you did things for them that they could do for themselves. Or, there were those who were only in my life to get me to make a change and then suddenly disappear. I used to wonder why those kinds of people were in my life until I realized that they were fulfilling a purpose that I didn't understand until years later. They were the ones who were the catalysts to bring about change. They were the ones who broke me free from my comfort zones and forced me to see a new side of Life. I read somewhere that everyone you meet is either a blessing or a lesson. It didn't dawn on me until recently that that statement was

Lessons Learned - MONEY

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  It finally dawned on me today - Money is not my life. Let me explain: for many years, there were certain people who constantly told me that I needed to save my money and that my life was nothing without money. And so, I believed them. One person in particular told me to save money every time they saw me, or at least it felt that way. And every time they told me to save my money, I told them that yes, I was doing just that. Except I wasn't. What I was doing was ruining my credit and spending money like it was water. For many years, I felt as though I never had enough to keep me afloat. Another person used to tell me that yes, money did make the world go round and I believed them as well. Fast forward to today - I knew that a bill was coming out of my account tomorrow and after that, my account would have a low balance. I thought to myself, "damn, I'll be broke for a day!" I then stopped and thought and thought and thought. I sat in my chair in my office and realized

Adventures With My Muses - Birthday! Part One

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 (Tea Muse art by Brittany Lewis ) Me: (reading a new book on the couch) Frederica: (reading the latest issue of The Strad magazine)  Tea Muse: I'm BORED! When are we doing another convention? Bubonicon was so much fun, especially with everyone enjoying the tea blends! Me: It's my day off, as well as yours. Enjoy it like we're doing!  Frederica: Yes, it's quite nice to get caught up on all my reading materials. (sipping her Earl Grey) Oh yes, quite nice.  Tea Muse: (grumbling) Reading is fun, but it's such a beautiful day today! Let's all go out for some hiking, or maybe go to a restaurant for a fancy lunch! Me: (lowering my book) Well, no one's stopping you. Go out and have fun! Frederica: (magazine covering her face) Yes. Do go.  Tea Muse: Argh! Fine! I'm leaving! (disappearing in a huff) Silence . . . . .  Me: (lowering my book) Coast clear? Frederica: (lowering her magazine) Coast is definitely clear.  Me: Fantastic! Now, I know that you and she hav