Lesson Learned - CONTRACT

 It was a day like any other - I had taken a break from work to talk with my boyfriend at the time. I knew he'd been with friends after a job interview. He had plans to return to his home city after being away from it for over ten years. I wanted to hear his voice, and my anxiety wanted to make sure that we were still cool with each other. Imagine my surprise when not only did he say that he was no longer interested in me, but he was telling me, "since so many guys flirt with you, why don't you pursue one of them?" I had told him that I met many men (and women) at sci-fi conventions while selling my books, and of course, many guys flirted with me. However, I wasn't interested in any of them because I was happy with my relationship. I couldn't believe what he was telling me, and twenty minutes later, I returned to work with tears streaming down my face. Years later, I wish I could tell him THANK YOU for what he did. Yes, he was afraid to continue the relationship but more importantly - the contract was over. It took me many years to understand this concept, yet once I did I knew that I could handle the world much better. When people say "it wasn't meant to be", I think that's only half right. Yes, it's true that when something falls apart, it wasn't meant to be. But, I also believe that there are "contracts" between people, or a person and a job, or whatever. We engage with others or job or whatever situation until whatever needs to be handled gets handled. In the case of the boyfriend, his dumping me led me to rely on myself more, lose a ton of weight, and begin my life as a tea vendor at farmers' markets. I dated another guy years before him who was only in my life for seven months; during that time, he was the catalyst to get me out of a crummy apartment, get rid of my cats that were destroying my apartment and my things, and also herald the beginning of my life as a published author. The contract was over and he flitted off to do something else. When friendships or jobs or whatever start to fall apart before our eyes, we want to hold on to it as tightly as possible. Are we afraid of the unknown, or perhaps we think that this is "comfort" to us because we are familiar with it? Yet, in knowing that the "contract" is over, we can better understand that some matters in our lives were not meant to last that long. They were brought to our lives to assist us with a "level up" or we are to assist them with something they are trying to overcome. Perhaps that crummy job was only in your life so as to get you to help you with one bill, or make that ONE friend who would become a solid rock in your life. Whatever the case may be, when it falls apart, the "contract" is over. The debris can be removed so as to make room for what is to come next. And usually, it is better. And usually, we learn more about ourselves in the process. 

Lesson learned.