Leason Learned - DEATH

 While enjoying a quiet period of reading the other day, I learned that a man I knew really well had died. I blinked several times in shock because I had spoken to him quite recently. He was a talented artist and overall good soul. I searched social media to learn that yes, he had died. I was stunned. Recently, I met two women from Israel and soon, we were caught up in a delightful conversation. I showed them the library book that I was reading (My Wild Garden by Meir Shalev) and their eyes grew wide. Oh yes, he's really famous in Israel, they told me, and he died recently. My heart went straight to my feet and tears formed in my eyes. Although I had never met the man, the one book I was reading by him had formed a connection that I could not deny. So, in learning that he was dead, I felt as though a dearest friend had left this world. Thankfully, the author had written many books, so our connection was restored. So much Death surrounding us. Whenever we hear of a famous person or someone we know dying, it seems to hit us quite hard. Some of us, I'm assuming, go into shock when we hear that the Angel of Death has claimed someone else. And yet and still, Death is the greatest mystery of them all. What happens when we die? Do we go to a Paradise or an Elysium-like place? Are we sent to a wilderness, or perhaps we get to return to Earth for another chance at Life? Do we go to another plane of existence, or perhaps we become worm food while we sleep forever? For years, Death worried me greatly, mostly because I had no idea where we go when we die. It scared the ever-living fuck out of me, to be honest. Then one day, I learned about the Death Positive Movement and Order of the Good Death. These people wanted to just talk about Death with others, giving people a chance to express their frustrations, worries, or concerns. I located a group here in Denver and they are some of the friendliest people I've ever known. Open, warm, accepting - funny how Death Positive people are like that. People have criticized me for my reaction to Death. When my grandparents died, I did not cry but rather remembered them as best as I could. Many years later when I visited their graves, I cried once, dried my tears, and vowed that I would live for them AND for myself. Years later, one of my closest friends died rather suddenly, and I literally lost my shit. Thankfully, I was in a car, but I still lost my shit. He was a rock and a force to be reckoned with, yet he was also a human being as well. I loved him like a brother. When he left, I felt a huge hole in the world. And still, another dear friend of mine who was a force to be reckoned with was taken away from us and I screamed at the Morrigan. The Morrigan is the Celtic goddess of War and Death. I screamed at this goddess, telling her that she made a mistake when she took Kathryn. Kathryn was a Renaissance woman, one who would have laughed at a massive black dragon intent on destroying the world. She was just that strong. When I learned about her death, I knew it had to have been a mistake. Years later, I am now in a place where I can finally accept that both she and my other friend are gone. So, here I am on a Monday, typing this essay. This lesson that I am still learning about Death. I no longer want to be afraid of it but rather understand that yes, we will ALL die. Black, white, gay, straight, whatever - we will all die. So, in knowing that . . . . how about we enjoy Life a little better? Laugh with our friends, and apologize when we have messed up. Walk away from those who seek to destroy you with their toxic ways. Allow colour into your world. Acknowledge that everyone is different, so stop acting like YOU are the only one who is right. Death loves us all. And we must show the proper respect toward not only Death but also ourselves. 

Lesson Learned and It Still Hurts. 

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